4TH OF JULY JOKES
On July 4, 1776, thirteen colonies claimed independence from England's King George III. And thus was born the mightiest nation on earth: The United States of America.
Leading up to the signing, there had been growing unrest in the colonies surrounding the taxes that the American colonists were required to pay to England.
The major
objection was 'Taxation without Representation': the
colonists had no say in the decisions of the English Parliament since
they did not send representative to sit in the English House of Commons.
Rather than attempting to negotiate a satisfactory settlement, King
George sent troops to the colonies to quell any rebellion that might
break out. The following timeline will give you some idea of
the
history that lead to the signing of the Declaration of Independence and
America's break away from British rule...
1774
- The 13 colonies send delegates to Philadelphia, Pennsylvania to form
the First Continental Congress. While unrest was brewing, the colonies
were far from ready to declare war.
April 1775 - King George's troops advance on Concord, Massachusetts,
prompting Paul Revere's midnight ride that sounded the alarm: "The
British are coming, the British are coming." Thus began the
American Revolution at the battle of Concord.
May 1776 - After nearly a year of trying to settle their differences
with England, the colonies, once again, send delegates to the Second
Continental Congress.
June 1776 - Admitting that their efforts were hopeless, a committee was
formed to compose the formal Declaration of Independence. Headed by
Thomas Jefferson, the committee also included John Adams, Benjamin
Franklin, Philip Livingston and Roger Sherman.
June 28, 1776 - Jefferson presents the first draft of the declaration
to congress.
-- Funny 4th of July Jokes -- Funny 4th of July Jokes --
July 4, 1776
- After various
changes to Jefferson's original draft, a vote was taken late in the
afternoon of July 4th. Of the 13 colonies, 9 voted in favour of the
Declaration; 2, Pennsylvania and South Carolina voted No; Delaware was
undecided and New York abstained. John Hancock, President of
the
Continental Congress, was the first to sign the Declaration of
Independence. It is said that he signed his name "with a great
flourish" so "King George can read that without spectacles!"
July 6, 1776 - The Pennsylvania Evening Post is the first newspaper to
print the Declaration of Independence.
July 8, 1776 - The first public reading of the declaration takes place
in Philadelphia's Independence Square. The bell in Independence Hall,
then known as the "Province Bell" would later be renamed the "Liberty
Bell" after its inscription - "Proclaim Liberty Throughout All the Land
Unto All the Inhabitants Thereof.Fourth of July"
August 1776 - The task begun on July 4, the signing of the Declaration
of Independence, was not actually completed until August. Nonetheless,
the 4th of July has been accepted as the official anniversary of United
States independence from Britain.
July 4, 1777 - The first Independence Day celebration takes place. It's
interesting to speculate what those first 4th festivities were like. By
the early 1800s the traditions of parades, picnics, and fireworks were
firmly established as part of American Independence Day culture.
-- Short 4th of July Jokes -- Short 4th of July Jokes
--
What's
red, white, blue and
green?
A seasick Uncle Sam
What would you get if you crossed a monster with Yankee Doodle?
Yankee Doofus
Did you hear about the cartoonist in the Continental Army?
He was a Yankee doodler
What ghost haunted King George III?
The spirit of '76
What's big, cracked, and carries your luggage?
The Liberty Bellhop
What did the visitor say as he left the Statue of Liberty?
"Keep in torch"
What's red, white, blue, and green?
A patriotic pickle
-- Short 4th of July Jokes -- Short 4th of July Jokes --
What would
you get if you
crossed a colonial hairpiece with a teepee?
A powdered wigwam
What would you get if you crossed the American national bird with
Snoopy?
A bald beagle
What did George Washington say to his army at Valley Forge?
"Sorry, men. The flights to Florida are all booked up"
What famous pig signed the Declaration of Independence?
John Hamcock
Why were the early American settlers like ants?
Because they lived in colonies.
What did King George think of the American colonists?
He thought they were revolting
-- Short 4th of July Jokes -- Short 4th of July Jokes --
Teacher: "Which son of old Virginia wrote the Declaration of
Independence?"
Student: "I think it was Thomas Jeffer's son."
What was Thomas Jefferson's favourite dessert?
Monti jello
What was the craziest battle of the Revolutionary War?
The Battle of Bonkers Hill.
What cat said, "The British are coming! The British are coming!"?
Paw Revere.
