You also need a certain amount of exercise, and you need to have good
sleeps.
Because of the effects of crash dieting you may want to diet slower and
only diet during the weekends, while during the rest of the week you
can focus on work and don't have to worry about what you eat - you can
eat whatever you want.
Weekend diet is also good in the long term as crash diets usually mean
you regain your weight fairly quick, while the longer you take to lose
it, the longer you can keep the weight down after the dieting period.
So, from 8am on Monday to 6pm on Friday your are allowed to eat
hamburgers, chips, pizzas, chocolate, whatever you feel like and you
are still alright doing your beach body diet.
At 5pm on Friday, as soon as you finish work, go straight to the bottle
shop and stock up the necessities for the weekend.
Get a carton of beer, a few bottles of wine and why not a bottle of Rum.
(don't forget Coke or whatever mixers you like, although for dieting
purposes they need to be the low-calory versions).
-- Beach Body Diet Jokes --
Once at
home with the load,
open a beer and get ready for going to your favourite pub or bar.
This is a low-stress activity, so have a few beers before you go out
and then keep consuming throughout the night.
You will notice that you will go without a dinner that night, as beer
is fairly filling, and in case you would start feeling hungry, have a
different drink, like rum.
Guiness will also eliminate your hunger feelings.
-- Beach Body Diet Jokes --
Meanwhile,
throughout the night,
you will notice that you are getting a lot of excercise by walking up
to the bar and back when getting drinks;
and visiting the toilet between every couple of drinks.
Later on if you continue to a night club, you will get some true
work-out when dancing.
You will get home late that night, but you will have a big sleep-in
(remember it was said before that it was important to have good sleeps
while dieting).
In fact there is no reason to get out of the bed before pm hours when
it is more ok to open a beer again.
This will minimise the time suffering from the dog that bit you last
night.
-- Beach Body Diet Jokes --
You will notice that the last thing you want to think about is food, so
you will skip the meals and instead you will take some Aspirin -
which is medically proven to be good for your heart.
After a few beers in the late afternoon, you will be ready for another
exercise session.
If you want to increase the amount of exercise you get, a good tips can
be to go on a pub crawl instead of staying in the same pub.
You will notice that you won't be able to consume quite as much as the
previous night, but you are still not hungry.
You return home earlier, perhaps with a little less workout (dancing at
the night club), but you have done more walking between the different
institutions.
Also, as you get home a little earlier, you will have even better sleep.
-- Beach Body Diet Jokes --
On Sunday, you will get up a little earlier than on the previous day,
starting to adjust your body clock back to more similar hours what it
is used to during the week.
You will have an Aspirin again, and your appetite hasn't still returned.
During the first pm hour you are allowed to open a beer and you can go
for a Sunday outing such as a football match, where you again get some
exercise by walking to the bar and back while bringing drinks for
yourself and your mates.
Starting the Sunday beach body diet session earlier means that you will
get home even earlier than on the Saturday night.
In fact, it is not unusual on those football matches that you will be
in the bed as early as 8 or 9pm, leaving you with more than enough time
to have a really good sleep, while you still don't feel like eating.
-- Beach Body Diet Jokes --
On Monday
morning, you will be
feeling good and full of energy although you may still need an Aspirin
and it may take until lunch time before your full apetite returns. Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...
a fat guy walks into a bar
woohoo Not rated yet
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You feel really thin after the weekend diet so during the week you'll
be able to eat whatever you want.
This beach body diet will slowly but surely make you loose weight in
the long term, while keeping you happy, giving you good sleeps and
exercise.
What Other Jokes Have Been Submitted
"hey man, you are fat" said the bar tender as the fat guy approached him.
"yeah that may be so, but not as fat as your mom" the fat guy quipped.
…
what do u say when u eat macaroni?
woohoo
Jimmy: You Want A Soda?
Brandy: Yes I Would Like One.
Jimmy: Okay I'm Going To Get You A Diet Soda
Brandy: Umm Why
Jimmy: Because You Look Kind Of …
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