BLONDE GIRL JOKES

A blonde was visiting Washington, DC for the first time.



She wanted to see the Capitol building.

But she couldn't find it, so she asked a police officer for directions.

"Excuse me, officer, how do I get to the Capitol building?"

The officer replied, "Wait here at this bus stop for the bus number 54.

It'll take you right there."

She thanked the officer and he drives off.

Three hours later the police officer returned to the same area and, sure enough, the blonde is still waiting at the same bus stop.

The officer got out of his car and said, "Excuse me, but to get to the Capitol building, I said to wait here for the number 54 bus and that was three hours ago!

Why are you still waiting?"

The blonde replied, "Don't worry, officer, it won't be long now...

The 45th bus just went by!"

Blonde Girl Jokes -- Camping Trip

A blonde goes on her first camping trip.

Her husband, who is a Scout Leader, is sick so she volunteers to take over for him one weekend.

She gets everyone together and assigns different duties to each scout.

They all arrive at Big Moose Mountain and are getting ready for hiking up the mountain.

But first, they want to get something to eat.

So the Blonde asks some scouts to prepare the meal and off they go.

About 10 minutes later the scouts come back and told the blonde, "We can't make the meal.

We can't light a fire with the matches you brought."

The blonde replied, "I don't understand!

Those matches should be perfectly fine.

I tested them all just before we left."

Blonde Girl Jokes -- Egyptian Pyramids

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went for a trip to Egypt and came across a pyramid.

It was a strange pyramid, with a sign at the bottom of the steps that read: “This is the pyramid of 100 steps.

If you get to the top of it, you will get what you’ve wished all your life.

But be warned, every five steps someone will pop out and tell you a joke, and if you laugh, you can never try again.”

So the brunette gets to the 5th step and laughs, so she could never try again.

The red head got to the 20th step and laughed, so she could never try again.

Then the blonde got to the 99th step and laughed.

The guy who was going to tell the joke said “Why did you laugh, i didn't tell the joke yet.”

The blonde said “I know, i laughed because i just got the first joke!”

Blonde Girl Jokes -- A Blonde Golfer

A blonde golfer goes into the pro shop and looks around frowning.

Finally the pro asks her what she wants. "I can't find any green golf balls," the blonde golfer complains.

The pro looks all over the shop, and through all the catalogs, and finally calls the manufacturers and determines that sure enough, there are no green golf balls.

As the blonde golfer walks out the door in disgust, the pro asks her, "I am just curious, why do you you want green golf balls?"

"Well obviously, because they would be so much easier to find in the sand traps!"

Blonde Girl Jokes -- Parachute Training

A blonde was learning parachute jumping, and on the first day of training she listened to the instructor.

He told them to start preparing for landing when they are at 300 feet.

The blonde asked, "How am I supposed to know when I'm at 300 feet?"

"That's a good question. When you get to 300 feet, you can recognize the faces of people on the ground."

After pondering for a while, the blonde asked, "What happens if I don't know anyone?"

Blonde Girl Jokes -- Blonde at Football Game

A guy decides to bring his blonde girlfriend to a football game.

After the game is over, he asks her if she liked the game.

She replies: "Oh it was great, I loved watching those men in tight clothes, but there is one thing I don't understand."

"What did you not understand?"

"Well, at the beginning of the game, both teams flipped a quarter to see who would kick off first.

Then the rest of the game everybody was yelling get the quarter back, get the quarter back, get the quarter back.

So I thought to myself, gosh it's just a quarter!"

Blonde Girl Jokes -- How Do Parachutes Work?

There is a guy who goes skydiving for the first time.

After he jumps out of the plane, he counts to ten, pulls the ripcord, but nothing happens.

A little worried, he pulls the cord for the auxiliary parachute, but the chute still does not appear.

As he is plummeting down, he sees a blonde coming up the other way.

He shouts to her "Do you know anything about parachutes?"

"No", the blonde says, "Do you know anything about gas stoves?"