CLEAN FUNNY BLONDE JOKES

Three blondes are changing a light bulb. One of them calls 911.



Blonde: We need help. We're three blondes changing a light bulb.

Operator: Hmmmmm. You put in a fresh bulb?

Blonde: Yes.

Operator: The power in the house in on?

Blonde: Of course.

Operator: And the switch is on?

Blonde: Yes, yes.

Operator: And the bulb still won't light up?

Blonde: No, it's working fine.

Operator: Then what's the problem?

Blonde: We got dizzy spinning the ladder around, and we all fell on the ground and hurt ourselves.

Clean Funny Blonde Jokes -- Blonde House on Fire

A blonde called 911, screaming "Help me, Help me my house is on fire!"

The dispatch said "Ma'am, please calm down. I need to get some information from you".

The blonde kept yelling "Help me, help me my house is on fire".

The dispatch said "Mam calm down, how do we get to your house?"

The blonde screamed "What? In the big red truck!"

Clean Funny Blonde Joke -- Blonde Cooks the Cake

A man tells his blonde wife that he has invited four friends for dinner on Friday night.

She is a bit nervous and asks if she must cook a meal for the four.

He explains that there will be eight coming, because each will bring his partner.

Since this is their first party, he suggests that she just get some Chinese food in and perhaps she can bake a cake.

This sounds like a good idea, so they sit down and decide what Chinese food to get.

Friday morning, the wife calls the man at work.

She explains that the only cake recipe she has will only feed four.

The man says, "Why don't you just double the recipe?"

She says that it is a good idea.

At 4:00, he gets another phone call -- this time quite frantic.

"I just can't do it," she weeps. "It's impossible."

"Now, now, what's the matter?"

"Well, their recipe calls for 2 eggs ..."

"So, you use 4 eggs. Don't you have them?"

"Yes - then it needs 4 cups of flour."

"Well," the man says rather testily, "you will have to use 8 cups of flour, what is the problem?"

"It isn't the ingredients," she sobs.

"It says that the cake must be baked at 350 degrees and I have checked the oven and I can't turn the heat up to 700 degrees!

Clean Funny Blonde Jokes -- Canadian Winters

An elderly blonde lived on a small farm in Canada, just yards from the North Dakota border.

Their land had been the subject to a minor dispute between the United States and Canada for years.

The now widowed blonde, lived on the farm with her son and three grandchildren.

One day, her son came into her room holding a letter.

"I just got some news, Mom," he said.

"The government has come to an agreement with the people in Washington.

They've decided that our land is really part of the United States.

We have the right to approve or disapprove the agreement. What do you think?"

"What do I think?" his blonde mother said.

"Sign it! Call them right now and tell them we accept!

I don't think I could stand another one of those Canadian winters!"

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