Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
How do I go about getting that fixed?"
Tech Rep: "I'm sorry, but did you say a cup holder?"
Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my computer."
Tech Rep: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, it's because I am.
Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a trade show?
How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark on it?"
Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a promotional.
It's not a separate thing, it pops out of my computer."
Tech Rep: "A cup holder pops out of your computer? We don't have such computers."
Caller: "Yes, you do. It's a large cup holder, about the size of a CD plate.
So I was using a big cup and it broke off.......
Computer Related Jokes -- Computer Supply Jokes -- Texan Win 98
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Texas edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside Texas.
If you have one of the Texas editions you may need some help understanding it.
The Texas edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen.
It reads WINDERS 98 with a background picture of General Lee superimposed on a confederate flag.
It is shipped with a Daisy Duke screen saver.
Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse.
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption.
Dialup Networking is called Good Ol' Boys.
Control Panel is known as the Dern Dashboard.
Hard Drive is referred to as 4 wheel drive, and floppies are them little ole plastic thangs.
Instead of an error message you get a winder cover with a garbage bag and duct tape.
It features some of these messages:
OK = ats aww-right
cancel = hell no
reset = aw shit
yes = shore
no = naaaa
find = hunt-fer it
go to = over yonder
back = back yonder
help = hep me out here
stop = ternit off
start = crank it up
settings = sittins
programs = stuff at does
Stuff documents = stuff I done done
Also note that winders 98 does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks.
We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Texas edition.
You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.
Computer Related Jokes --
Short Computer Related Jokes
"Salary Theorem" states that
"Engineers and Scientists can never earn as much as Business Executives and Sales People."
This theorem can now be supported by a mathematical equation based on the following two postulates:
1. Knowledge is Power.
2. Time is Money.
As every engineer knows:
Power = Work / Time
Knowledge = Power
Time = Money
It follows that:
Knowledge = Work/Money.
Solving for Money, we get:
Money = Work / Knowledge.
Thus, as Knowledge approaches zero, Money approaches infinity, regardless of the amount of work done.
The less you know, the more you make.