How did the telephones get married ?
In a double ring ceremony
Why did the clock get sick?
It was run down
Phil played the harmonica so well he now plays with what symphony
orchestra?
The Philharmonica.
Why did the boy blush when he opened the fridge?
He saw the salad dressing.
If a
buttercup is yellow,
what colour is a hiccup?
Burple.
Waiter, this soup tastes funny?
Then why aren't you laughing
What is the biggest pencil in the world?
Pennsylvania.
Whats red and flies and wobbles at the same time ?
A jelly copter
-- Cute Jokes for Children --
How does a snake feel when he sheds his skin?
Snaked.
What's the worst thing ever found in a school lunchroom?
The food
How do you stop a dog from barking in the back seat of a car?
Make him sit up front.
How do you make milk shake ?
Give it a good scare
What kind of car does Luke Skywalker drive?
a Toy-yoda.
Did you hear the story about the piece of butter?
Never mind. I don't want to spread it around.
-- Short Kids Jokes --
How do you know that carrots are good for the eyes?
Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing eyeglasses?
Why do eskimos wash their clothes in tide?
Because it's too cold out tide
What runs but never walks ?
Water
How do you keep a rhinoceros from charging?
Take away his credit cards.
What do you do when your chair breaks?
Call a Chairman.
Why did the atoms cross the road?
It was time to split
What dance did the Pilgrims do?
The Plymouth Rock.
-- Cute Jokes for Children --
What kind of hair do oceans have ?
Wavy
What broadcasting company has the best horror shows?
The Ghost-to-Ghost network.
Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door?
He wanted to win the No-bell prize.
How much do pirates pay for their earrings?
a Buccaneer
Did you hear the story about the oatmeal?
Never mind. It's a lot of mush.
What animals are poor dancers?
Four-legged ones, because they have two left feet.
Do you know the time ?
No, we haven't met yet
-- Cute Jokes for Children --
When is a car not a car?
When it turns into a garage.
If you scratch a horse's hair on a cat gut, what do you get?
Violin music.
What amusement park ride breaks up romances?
A merry-go-round. When the ride is over, people stop going around with
each other.
Why was the broom late ?
It over swept
What do you get if Batman and Robin get smashed by a steam roller?
Flatman and ribbon.
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Why are elephants always first in the pool?
Because they already have thier tunks on.
What cat likes to bowl?
An alley cat.
Why do flamingoes always …
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