HILARIOUS CLEAN JOKES 

Pat Buchanan: To steal a job from a decent, hard-working American.

Karl Marx: It was an historical inevitability.

Charles Darwin: Chickens, over great periods of time, have been naturally selected in such a way that they are now genetically dispositioned to cross roads.

Martin Luther King, Jr: I can see one day there be a world where all chickens will be free to cross roads without having their motives called into question.

Richard M. Nixon: The chicken did not cross the road. I repeat, the chicken did NOT cross the road.

Hilarious Clean Jokes -- Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Ronald Reagan: What? chicken?

Bill Clinton: I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. What do you mean by chicken? Could you define chicken, please?

Tiger Woods: It wasn't just one chicken, there were at least 10 of them, but i am not talking about these things in public, it's a private matter.

Jacques Chirac: We are chickens, and will veto any resolution that may force us to cross a road. It isn't safe.

George W. Bush: We don't really care about why the chicken crossed the road. We just want to know if the chicken is on our side of the road or not. The chicken is either with us or it is against us. There is no middle ground here.

Saddam Hussein: This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping 50 tons of nerve gas on it.

Hilarious Clean Jokes -- Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Homer Simpson: Mmmmmm. Chicken.

O.J. Simpson: Absolutely one-hundred percent unsure.

Bill Gates: I have just released the new Microsoft Chicken 2007, which will not only cross roads, but will lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance your checkbook.

Buddha: If you ask this question, you deny your own chicken nature.

The Pope: That is only for God to know.

Aristotle: It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.

Plato: For the greater good.

Voltaire: I may not agree with what the chicken did, but I will defend to the death its right to do it.

Hilarious Clean Jokes -- Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Ernest Hemingway: To die. In the rain. Alone.

Albert Einstein: Did the chicken really cross the road or did the road move beneath the chicken?

Albert Camus: It doesn't matter; the chicken's actions have no meaning except to him.

Grandpa: In my days, we didn't ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road, and that was good enough for us.

Jack Nicholson: 'cause it f*****g wanted to. That's the f*****g reason.

Colonel Sanders: Damn, I missed one!

John Lennon: Imagine all the chickens crossing roads in peace.

Hilarious Clean Jokes -- Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Colin Powell: Now at the left of the screen, you clearly see the satellite image of the chicken crossing the road.

Hans Blix: We have reason to believe there is a chicken, but we have not yet been allowed access to the other side of the road.

Captain Kirk: To boldly go where no chicken has gone before.

Ralph Waldo Emerson: It didn't cross the road; it transcended it.

Fox Mulder: It was a government conspiracy

George Orwell: Because the government had fooled him into thinking that he was crossing the road of his own free will, when he was really only serving their interests.

Hilarious Clean Jokes -- Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Barry Scheck: Were you there? WERE YOU?? Did you see that chicken cross that road? Well?? DID YOU???

Jerry Seinfeld: Why does anyone cross a road? I mean, why doesn't anyone ever think to ask, "What the heck was this chicken doing walking around all over the place, anyway?"

Dr. Seuss: Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad? Yes! The chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, I've not been told!

B.F. Skinner: Because the external influences, which had pervaded its sensorium from birth, had caused it to develop in such a fashion that it would tend to cross roads, even while believing these actions to be of its own free will.

Oliver Stone: The question is not, "Why did the chicken cross the road?" Rather, it is, "Who was crossing the road at the same time, whom we overlooked in our haste to observe the chicken crossing?"

Hilarious Clean Jokes: Why Did the Chicken Cross the Road?

Anderson Consulting:

Deregulation of the chicken's side of the road was threatening its dominant market position. The chicken was faced with significant challenges to create and develop the competencies required for the newly competitive market. Anderson Consulting, in a partnering relationship with the client, helped the chicken by rethinking its physical distribution strategy and implementation processes. Using the Poultry Integration Model (PIM), Anderson helped the chicken use its skills, methodologies, knowledge, capital and experiences to align the chicken's people, processes and technology in support of its overall strategy within a Program Management framework. Anderson Consulting convened a diverse cross-spectrum of road analysts and best chickens along with Anderson consultants with deep skills in the transportation industry to engage in a two-day itinerary of meetings in order to leverage their personal knowledge capital, both tacit and explicit, and to enable them to synergize with each other in order to achieve the implicit goals of delivering and successfully architecting and implementing an enterprise-wide value framework across the continuum of poultry cross-median processes. The meeting was held in a park-like setting, enabling and creating an impactful environment which was strategically based, industry-focused, and built upon a consistent, clear, and unified market message and aligned with the chicken's mission, vision, and core values. This was conducive towards the creation of a total business integration solution. Anderson Consulting helped the chicken change to become more successful.

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