HILARIOUS DUMB BLONDE JOKES

Two blondes were in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger.




They tried and tried to get the door open, but they couldn't.

The blonde with the coat hanger stopped for a moment to catch her breath, and her friend said anxiously,

"Hurry up!

It's starting to rain and the top is down."

Hilarious Dumb Blonde Jokes -- Blondes and Cars

A blonde tried to sell her old car.

But it wasn't easy to sell it because the car had 250,000 miles on it.

One day, she told her problem to a brunette she worked with.

The brunette told her, "There is a way you can make the car easier to sell, but it's not legal."

"That doesn't matter," replied the blonde, "if I only can sell the car."

"Okay," said the brunette. "Here is the address of a friend of mine.

He owns a car repair shop.

Tell him I sent you and he will turn the counter in your car back to 50,000 miles.

Then it should not be a problem to sell your car anymore."

The following weekend, the blonde made the trip to the mechanic.

Some time later, the brunette asked the blonde, "Did you sell your car?"

"No," replied the blonde, "why should I? It only has 50,000 miles on it."

Hilarious Dumb Blonde Jokes -- Blondes and Cars

A blonde walked into a gas station and said to the manager,

”I locked my keys in my car.

Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?”

”Why sure,” said the manager, ”we have something that works especially well for that.”

A couple minutes later, the manager walked outside to see how the blonde was doing and he heard another voice.

”No, no! A little to the left,” said the other blonde inside the car.

Hilarious Dumb Blonde Jokes -- Blondes and Cars

While driving during a horrible snowstorm, a young blonde became disoriented and lost.

She remembered what her father had once told her.

”If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, wait for a snow plow and follow it.”

Pretty soon a snow plow came by, and she started to follow it.

She followed the plow for about 45 minutes.

Finally, the driver of the truck got out and asked her what she was doing.

She explained that her dad had told her if she ever got lost in the snowstorm, to follow a plow.

The driver nodded and said, ”Well, I’m done with the parking lot here at Wal-Mart, now you can follow me over to K-Mart.”

Hilarious Dumb Blonde Jokes -- Blondes and Cars

A blonde was driving home after work and got caught in a really bad hailstorm.

Her car was covered with dents, so the next day she took it to the repair shop.

The shop owner saw that she was a blonde, so he decided to have some fun.

He told her just to go home and blow into the tail pipe really hard, and all the dents would pop out.

So, the blonde went home, got down on her hands and knees and started blowing into her car's tailpipe.

Nothing happened. She blew a little harder, and still nothing happened.

Her roommate, another blonde, came home and said, "What are you doing?"

The first blonde told her how the repairman had instructed her to blow into the tailpipe in order to get all the dents to pop out.

Her roommate rolled her eyes and said...

"HEL-LOOOOOOOO ...

You gotta roll up the windows!!!

Hilarious Dumb Blonde Jokes -- Blondes and Cars

There was a nouveau riche blond girl, who went to the nearest Mercedes showroom and came out with the latest model.

Half an hour later she was back at the showroom, claiming that the car they sold her was terrible, that she was disappointed that a brand-new Mercedes would get a fault in the gearbox after 15 minutes.

The management apologized and gave her a new car.

Again, after half an hour she came back.

The management offered her a new car, but sent along one of their engineer to see if he could figure out what the problem was.

She put in the first gear… sped up… put in second… third… fourth… fifth…. “And now,” she said, “for the rocket,” and threw it in reverse.

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The blond who DIDNT know how Not rated yet
Why was the blonde confused when she was asked to spell Mississippi? She didn't know if they meant the river or the state.

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