OBAMA JOKES
What's the problem with Barack Obama jokes?
His followers don't think they're funny and other people don't think they're jokes.
The President and Native Americans
It was election time, so Barack Obama decided to go out to the local reservation to gather support from the Native Americans.
They were all assembled in the Council Hall to hear the speech.
Obama had worked up to his finale, and the crowd was getting more and more excited.
"I promise better education opportunities for Native Americans!"
The crowd went wild, shouting "Hoya! Hoya!"
Obama was a bit puzzled by the native word, but was encouraged by their enthusiasm.
"I promise gambling reforms to allow a Casino on the Reservation!"
"Hoya! Hoya!" cried the crowd, stomping their feet.
"I promise more social reforms and job opportunities for Native Americans!"
The crowd reached a frenzied pitch shouting "Hoya! Hoya! Hoya!"
After the speech, Obama was touring the Reservation, and saw a tremendous herd of cattle.
Wanting to show his interest, he asked the Chief if he could get closer to take a look at the cattle.
"Sure," the Chief said, "but be careful not to step in the hoya."
Barack Obama Jokes -- Jokes about Obama
Four boys were fishing. As their boat rounded a point on the lake, they saw a man thrashing in the water.
With no hesitation, they jumped into the water and saved him.
It was not until they pulled him to shore that they noticed the man they had saved was President Obama, who had slipped away from the Secret Service for a swim.
When President Obama caught his breath, he thanked the two boys and offered them anything they wanted in return for saving his life.
The first boy thought about it for a while and finally answered.
"I would like a presidential appointment to West Point so I can serve my country."
The next two thought that was a great idea, but one said he had always wanted to be a pilot so he would rather attend the Air Force Academy.
The third boy chose the Naval Academy.
The president turned to the fourth boy, who was still thinking.
Finally he answered, "Mr. President, I would like a burial with honors at Arlington National Cemetery"
The president was shocked and asked the boy why he would make such a request at his young age.
The boy replied "Because when my father finds out I saved you, he is going to kill me!"
Obama Jokes -- Michelle Obama Joke
The President and Mrs. Mitchelle Obama are in the front row at a Yankees game.
The row behind them is taken up with Secret Service agents, one of whom leans over and whispers something into the President's ear.
As soon as he finishes, Mr. Obama grabs Mitchelle by the scruff of the neck and heaves her over the railing.
Mitchelle falls 10 feet to the top of the dugout, kicking and screaming obscenities.
The Secret Service agent leans over again and whispers,
"Mr. President, I said, they want you to throw out the first PITCH!"
Barack Obama Jokes -- Anti Obama Jokes
A seedy-looking old man was sitting in the first row at a town meeting, heckling the President as he delivered a lengthy speech.
Finally the president pointed to the heckler and said, "Will that gentleman who differs with me please stand up and tell the audience what he has ever done for the good of America?"
"Well, Mr. Obama," the man said in a firm voice. "I voted against you in the last election."
Barack Obama Jokes -- Little Johnny Meets Obama
Little Johnny is at it again... President Obama was visiting a primary school and he visited one of the classes.
They were in the middle of a discussion related to words and their meanings.
The teacher asked the president if he would like to lead the discussion on the word 'tragedy'?
So our illustrious president asked the class for an example of a 'tragedy'.
One little boy stood up and offered: 'If my best friend, who lives on a farm, is playing in the field and a tractor runs over him and kills him, that would be a tragedy?'
'No,' said Obama, 'that would be an accident.'
A little girl raised her hand: 'If a school bus carrying 50 children drove over a cliff, killing everyone inside, that would be a tragedy.'
'I'm afraid not,' explained Obama. 'That's what we would call great loss.' The room went silent. No other children volunteered.
Obama searched the room. 'Isn't there someone here who can give me an example of a tragedy?'
Finally at the back of the room, Little Johnny raised his hand.
In a quiet voice he said: If the plane carrying you and Mrs. Obama was struck by a 'friendly fire' missile and blown to smithereens that would be a tragedy.'
'Fantastic!' exclaimed Obama. 'That's right. And can you tell me why that would be tragedy?'
'Well,'
says Little johnny, 'It has to be a tragedy, because it certainly
wouldn't be a great loss... and it probably wouldn't be an accident
either.
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Political Jokes
