He asked, "What are all those clocks?"
St. Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks.
Everyone on earth has a Lie-Clock.
Every time you lie, the hands on your clock move."
"Oh", said the man. "Whose clock is that?"
"That's Mother Teresa's," replied St. Peter.
"The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."
"Incredible," said the man.
"And whose clock is that one?"
St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock.
The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abraham told only two lies in his entire life."
"Where's G.W. Bush's clock?" asked the man.
"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan!"
Political Correctness Jokes -- Free Political Jokes
An older couple had a son, who was still living with his parents.
The parents were a little worried, as the son was still unable to decide
about his future career.
They decided to do a small test.
They took a ten-dollar bill, a bible, and a bottle of whiskey,
and put them on the front hall table, and hid, pretending they're not home.
The father's plan was: "If our son takes the money, he will be a businessman,
if he takes the bible, he will be a priest
- but if he takes the bottle of whiskey,
I'm afraid our son will be a drunkard."
So, the parents waited nervously, hiding in the nearby closet.
Peeping through the keyhole they saw their son arrive.
The son saw the note they had left.
Then, he took the 10-dollar bill, looked at it against the light, and slid it in his pocket.
After that, he took the bible, flicked through it, and took it.
Then, he grabbed the bottle, opened it and took a whiff, to get assured of the quality.
Then he left for his room, carrying all the three items.
The father slapped his forehead, and said:
"Darn. Our son is going to be a politician!"
Correctness Jokes --
Short Funny Political Jokes Click below to see contributions from other visitors to this page...
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A politician was campaigning in a rural area.
Outside a ramshackle house, he saw a young man milking a cow.
He approached the man, ready to make his pitch for a vote.
Just as he was getting started, an old man called from inside the house.
"Luke, get in the house.
And who is that guy you're talking to?"
"Says he's a politician, Pop," Luke said.
"In that case, you'd better bring the cow inside with you."
-- Political Correctness Jokes --
A Congressman was once asked about his attitude toward whiskey...
"If you mean the demon drink that poisons the mind, pollutes the body,
desecrates family life, and inflames sinners, then I'm against it.
But if you mean the elixir of Christmas cheer, the shield against winter chill,
the taxable potion that puts needed funds into public coffers to comfort little
crippled children, then I'm for it.
This is my position, and I will not compromise!"
What Other Jokes Have Been Submitted
What branch of the government stalls the most? The excuse-ative branch.
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