SHORT SANTA JOKES 

sHORT sANTA jOKES





The Santa Claus at the mall was very surprised when a young lady about twenty years old walked up and sat on his lap.

Santa doesn't usually take requests from adults, but she smiled very nicely at him, so he asked her,

"What do you want for Christmas?"

"Something for my mother, please." said the young lady.

"Something for your mother? Well, that's very thoughtful of you,'' smiled Santa.

"What do you want me to bring her?"

Without blinking she replied, "A son-in-law!"

---

Father Christmas: What's your favorite Christmas story?

Elf: The one where the three creatures are scared of the Big Bad Wolf and they grow on trees!

Father Christmas: You mean 'The Three Little Figs'.-

---

Just before Christmas, an honest politician, a generous lawyer and Santa Claus were riding in the elevator of a very posh hotel.

Just before the doors opened they all noticed a $20 bill lying on the floor.

Which one picked it up? Santa of course, because the other two don't exist!

What do the elves call it when Father Christmas claps his hands at the end of a play?

Santapplause.

What do you call people who are scared of Santa Claus?

Claustrophobic.

What do you call Santa when he has no money?

Saint "Nickel"-less.

Why was Santa's little helper depressed?

Because he had low elf esteem.

What do you call someone who doesn't believe in Father Christmas?

A rebel without a Claus.

What do you get if you cross Santa with a flying saucer?

A UF ho, ho, ho

---

What do you get if you cross Santa with a gardener? Someone who likes to hoe, hoe, hoe!

What nationality is Santa Claus?

North Polish

And what goes oh! oh! oh?

Father Christmas walking backwards.

Christmas is the time when everyone gets Santamental.

-- Short Santa Jokes --

What's red & white and red & white and red & white?

Santa rolling down a hill!

Where does Santa stay when he's on holidays?

At a Ho-ho-tel

What do you get if you cross Father Christmas with a detective?

Santa Clues.



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