Short Funny Blonde Jokes

Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said

"Look at that dog with one eye!"

The other blonde covers one of her eyes and goes, "Where?"

A blonde went to buy a Pizza and after ordering, the assistant asked the blonde if she would like her pizza cut into six pieces or twelve.

"Six please" she said, "I could never eat twelve!"

Why did the blonde move to L.A.?

It was easier to spell.

Did you hear about the blonde that was treated at the emergency room for a concussion and severe head wounds?

She tried to commit suicide by hanging herself with a bungee cord.

Did you hear about the blonde who called the county to have the Deer Crossing sign removed from her road?

It seems that too many deer were being hit by cars.

Why are the Japanese so smart?

No blondes.

-- Short Funny Blonde Jokes and One Liners --

Did you hear about the two blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?

They went to see "Closed for the Winter."

A brunette, a blonde, and a redhead are all in third grade. Who is the oldest?

The blonde, because she's 18.

Why did the blonde take 16 friends to the movies?

Under 17 not admitted!

Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane?

She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.

How did the blonde get ready for Y2K?

She changed all her y's to k's.

How do you drown a blonde?

Put a mirror at the bottom of the pool.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Two, one to hold the light bulb and one to spin the ladder around!

Why does it take longer to build a blonde snowman as opposed to a regular one?

You have to hollow out the head.

-- Short Funny Blonde Jokes and One Liners --

What do you call a blonde skeleton in the closet?

Last year's hide and seek champ.

Why does a blonde only change her baby's diapers every month?

Because it says on the box: "good for up to 20 pounds."

Santa Claus, one smart and one stupid blonde are walking together when they spot a hundred dollars on the ground.

Who will take the money? The stupid blonde, since Santa Claus and the smart blonde don’t exist.

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