SHORT FUNNY CLEAN JOKES
sHORT fUNNY cLEAN jOKES
Clean Doctor Jokes: The Man and the Frog
A man walks in to a doctors office with a frog on his head.
The doctor leaps up and says: "Good grief, how on earth did you get that ugly thing?"
The frog looks down and replies: "I dun no Doc, it started out as a little wart on my bottom!"
Salesmen Jokes
Three salesmen were bragging who is the best.
The first said, that he is so good he sold a colour television to a blind man.
The second bragged he sold a HI-FI stereo system to a deaf man.
The third said he sold a Cuckoo clock to a blonde lady.
The other two said, so what?
The third salesman added, along with the Cuckoo clock, I also sold her one hundred pounds of bird seeds!!!!!
-- Short Funny Blonde Jokes --
Blonde got the 4th child
He fills data in the birth certificate "Mother: Blonde. Father: Blonde. Kid: Chinese."
"How come you write "Chinese" when both parents are Blonde?"
"Aah, I read it in the newspaper", Blonde says.
"Every 4th person born on the Earth now is a Chinese."
-- Doctor and Nurse Jokes --
A very tired nurse walks into a bank,
Totally exhausted after an 18-hour shift.
Preparing to write a check,
She pulls a rectal thermometer out of her purse
And tries to write with it.
When she realizes her mistake,
She looks at the flabbergasted teller
And without missing a beat, she says:
'Well, that's great....that's just great....
Some asshole's got my pen!'
-- Short Funny Clean Jokes --
Animal Dog Funny Joke: The Sheep Dog
Maury the shepherd sent his sheep-dog out to gather and count the flock to make sure none were missing.
The dog returns and says that there are 40 sheep.
Maury: "40? I only started with 38!"
Dog: "Yeah, but you told me to round them up."
-- Short Funny Clean Jokes --
While waiting at a cross walk for the light to change, a blonde asked why the signal was buzzing.
When she was told that it was to let blind people know when the light was red, she replied, "What in the world are blind people doing driving?"
Economist Joke
A mathematician, physicist and economist after Titanic crash on uninhabited island in the middle of Atlantic ocean.
Starving to death they found a can of roastbeef.
They start debating how to open the can without can-opener.
Mathematician suggests to drop the can from the cliff to open it.
Physicist proposes to heat the can on bonfire.
Economist: "Let's suppose the can is opened...."
-- Short Funny Blonde Jokes --
A blond woman buys a bath.
The next day she returns to the shop claiming it's broken and leaking water, she says every time i fill it up it just empties.
The shop keeper replies, "have you put the plug in it?"
She replies "I never knew it was electrical."
Short Funny Clean Jokes -- Exam Jokes
A girl who was failing her class came to see her professor after class one day.
She went up to him and state that she would do ANYTHING to pass her exam.
She gazed meaningfully into his eyes for 30 seconds.
The professor asked, stuttering "a-anything?''
''ANYTHING''
The
professor looks up and down the hallway and drops his voice to a
whisper... "could you err.. please study?"
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