ULTIMATE BLONDE JOKES

A blonde was speeding when a policeman pulled her over.



The policeman walks up to the blonde and says

"Excuse m'am, could I please see your driving license and registration."

The blonde looks at the policeman angrily and says

"I wish you guys would get yourselves organised.

Just yesterday you take my license away and today you expect me to show it to you!"

Ultimate Blonde Jokes -- Free Funny Blonde Jokes

A blonde had just totaled her car in a horrible accident.

Miraculously, she got out without a scratch and was applying fresh lipstick when the police arrived.

"My God!" the policeman gasped.

"Your car looks like an accordion stomped on by an elephant.

Are you OK?"

"Yes, officer, I'm just fine," the blonde chirped.

"Well, how on the Earth did this happen?"

the officer asked as he surveyed the wrecked car.

"Officer, it was the strangest thing!" the blonde began.

I was driving along this road when from out of nowhere this TREE pops up in front of me.

So I swerved to the right, and there was another tree!

I swerved to the left and there was ANOTHER tree!

I swerved to the right and there was another tree!

I swerved to the left and there was ...."

"Uh, the officer said, cutting her off,

"There isn't a tree on this road for 30 miles.

That was your air freshener swinging back and forth."

Ultimate Blonde Jokes -- Free Funny Blonde Jokes

There was a blonde driving down the center of the road at 100 mph.

A police officer pulled her over to the side of the road.

When she had stopped, the officer asked,

"License and Registration please."

"It's okay, Officer, I have a special license that allows me to do this,"

she said smiling.

"That's impossible!" The officer replied,

"I've never heard of such a license."

The blonde handed him her license. The officer said,

"Just as I suspected.

This is an ordinary license,

I see nothing here that would allow you special consideration."

The blonde pointed to the bottom of the license and said,

"Can you see this? It says here: 'Tear Along The Dotted Line'."

Free Funny Blonde Jokes -- Blonde Cops

A blonde cop stops a blonde driver and asks for her driving license.

The blonde looks around everywhere in the car and can't find it.

She says to the cop,

"I must have left it at home officer."

The cop says, "Well, do you have any kind of identification?"

The driver looks around in the car again, and finds a pocket mirror.

She looks at it and says to the cop,

"All I have is this picture of myself."

and she gives the mirror to the blonde cop. He has a look at it and replies,

"Well, you can go.

If I had known you were a police officer,

I wouldn't have even pulled you over."