Short Valentine Day Jokes

What do farmers give their wives on Valentine's Day?

Hog and kisses.

Why did the pig give his girlfriend a box of candy?

It was Valenswine's Day.

Do skunks celebrate Valentine's Day?

Sure, they're very scent-imental.

What did the chocolate syrup say to the ice cream?

"I'm sweet on you."

What did the paper clip say to the magnet?

"I find you very attractive."

What did the French chef give his wife for Valentine's Day?

A hug and a quiche.

What did one pickle say to the other?

"You mean a great dill to me."

What did the elephant say to his girlfriend?

"I love you a ton."

-- Short Valentine Day Jokes --

What did the bat say to his girlfriend?

"You're fun to hang around with."

Did you hear about the nearsighted porcupine?

He fell in love with a pincushion.

What did the pencil say to the paper?

"I dot my i-s on you."

Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend?

She didn't suit his taste.

What did Frankenstein say to his girlfriend?

“Be my valenstein!”

Why is Valentine’s Day the best day for a celebration?

Because you can really party hearty.

Why should you send your sweetie a valentine?

Because you always heart the one you love.

-- Short Valentine Day Jokes --

What did the painter say to her boyfriend?

“I love you with all my art!”

What did one light bulb say to the other?

"I love you a whole watt!"

What do squirrels give for Valentine's Day?


What did the valentine card say to the stamp?

Stick with me and we'll go places.

What did the stamp say to the envelope?

I'm stuck on you.

Who sends a thousand valentines cards signed', guess who' ?

A divorce lawyer.

What did the light bulb say to the switch?

You turn me on.

Did Adam and Eve ever have a date?

No, but they had an apple.

-- Short Valentine Day Jokes --

What did one snake say to the other snake?

Give me a little hug and a hiss, honey.

Why did the banana go out with the prune?

Because it couldn't get a date.

What happens when you fall in love with a French chef?

You get buttered up.

What is a vampire's sweetheart called?

His ghoul-friend.

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