What did the cannibal get when he was late for dinner? The cold shoulder
A cannibal is a guy who goes into a restaurant and orders the waiter
Did you hear about the cannibal student who was suspended from school
for buttering up his teacher?
Have you heard about the cannibal restaurant where dinner costs an arm
and a leg?
Two cannibals were eating dinner.
One said: "I really hate my sister."
The other said: "Well, just eat the vegetables."
What do
cannibals do at a
wedding? They toast the bride and groom.
Did you hear about the cannibal spider that ate his uncle’s wife? He
was an aunteater.
When do cannibals cook you? On Fried-days.
What does a cannibal eat with cheese? Pickled organs.
What happens if you upset a cannibal? You get into hot water.
What did the cannibal say when he was full? I couldn’t eat another
mortal.
Why was the cannibal fined by the judge? He was caught poaching.
Why did the cannibal live on his own? He was fed up with other people.
Very Short Jokes: Cannibal One Liners
Well, children, said the cannibal cooking teacher.
“What did you make of the new English teacher?” “Burgers, ma am.”
Did you hear about the cannibal who joined the police force? He said he
wanted to grill his suspects.
Did you hear about the cannibal who commited suicide? He got himself
into a real stew.
Very Short Jokes about Cannibals
First cannibal: We had burglars last night. Second cannibal: Did they
taste good?
First cannibal: I don’t know what to make of my husband these days.
Second cannibal: How about a curry?
What does a cannibal call a skateboarder? Meals on wheels.
What is the cannibals favorite game? Swallow my Leader.
What happened to the cannibal lion? He had to swallow his pride.
What happened when the cannibal got a religion? He only ate Catholics
on Fridays.
Why didn’t the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a
paunch.
Why did the Scottish cannibal live on a sugar plantation?
He said so that I can feed my lads with my lasses.
Very Short
Jokes -- Cannibal One
Liners
Did you hear about the cannibal who went vegetarian? He couldn’t stop
eating swedes.
Cannibal Boy: I’ve brought a friend home for dinner.
Cannibal Mom: The dinner is ready. Put him in the fridge and we'll have
him tomorrow.
First cannibal: My wife’s a tough old bird.
Second cannibal: You should have left her in the oven for another half
an hour.
Very Short Jokes -- Cannibal One Liners
When a plane caught fire over the jungle the pilot ejected and landed
in a cannibal’s pot.
The cannibal turned to his friend and said, What’s this flier doing in
my soup?
First cannibal: Who was that girl I saw you with last night ?
Second cannibal: That was no girl, that was my supper.
Very Short Jokes about Cannibals
Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend? She didn’t suit his
taste.
What did the cannibal have for lunch? Baked beings.
How can you help a starving cannibal? Give them a hand.
What did the cannibal say to the explorer? Nice to meat you.
What do pygmy cannibals eat for breakfast? Weedie Bix.
What do cannibals call athletes? Fast food.
What happened when the cannibal crossed the Atlantic on the QE2?
He told the waiter to take the menu away and bring him the passenger
list.
Very Short Jokes -- Cannibal One Liners
First Cannibal: “Have you seen the dentist?”
Second Cannibal: “Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time.”